💋 CryptoCupid Report – Markets Got Us in a Situationship
💔 Bitcoin
Still acting emotionally unavailable. Pumps when you stop watching. Dumps the moment you feel hope.
$BTC basically said: “It’s not you… it’s liquidity.”
💌
$XRP Flirting with price levels like:
“Maybe I’ll move… maybe I won’t.”
Meanwhile Ripple keeps building while we refresh charts like desperate exes.
🥀 U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission
Still third-wheeling crypto relationships.
Nobody invited you to Valentine’s dinner, Gary.
💝 Binance
Volume pumping, traders spiraling, buttons getting smashed like “SEND IT BABE 🚀”
Retail falling in love with green candles again.
💘 Valentine’s Crypto Truth:
You don’t need flowers.
You don’t need chocolates.
You need patience, a plan, and diamond hands.
Because crypto doesn’t break hearts…
paper hands do.
Crypto on Valentine’s Day be like:
💔 Dumps at breakfast
💋 Pumps at lunch
🤡 Sideways at dinner
Me: still holding like a toxic relationship with potential.
#CryptoCupcake #Bitcoin #XRPArmy #CryptoHumor #CryptoSass