👑 This isn’t Princess Jeremiah’s lament — the numbers speak for themselves.

In a crypto kingdom lived Princess Jeremiah. She waited for the kings to keep their promises, for the market to rise, and for her treasury to turn a profit.

Bought the dip. Then bought the dip of the dip. Then decided I’d have been better off buying myself another crown: at least something on my head would be sparkling.

— Mirror, mirror, tell me: is altseason still ahead?

— It is, Princess. But the treasury is already behind us…

They promised her mountains of gold, but for now they gave her red candles and told her to be patient.

And so the princess sat down, took her calculator, compared the promises with the results—and shed a tear.

This isn’t Princess Jeremiah’s lament. She just calculated the returns. 😂📉