Time flies, and in the blink of an eye, it's been a year since I've been fighting on a battlefield without gunpowder. From a clueless rookie to a half-understanding novice, it seems like nothing has changed, but the money in my wallet has decreased, and I've aged a lot. I've gained nothing, and physically I feel worse and worse. Recently, I've discovered that there are two of me in my head: a rational me and an emotional me. Most of the time, the emotional me occupies my brain, taking the blame for my losses. The credit for this can only go to the emotional me, but I hope that most of the time I can be rational. I wish he could try to consume my brain, but he needs a magical tool. Only with this magical tool can he defeat the emotional side and gain the power to dominate my brain. What is this magical tool? The only word I can come to understand is 'wait'. But how difficult this is! Many times, rationality needs my cooperation, but I have never really helped it. Instead, I always seem to oppose it. This is because the emotional side occupies my brain. I am determined to drive it away. Yes, I do not need emotions. This requires a process. Perhaps now... perhaps tomorrow... perhaps... next month... or... someday next year. That day... will surely come!