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The Grandpa Who Only Trusted the “Big Boys” of Crypto 🎉

Old man Harold considered himself a “calm and composed investor,” though everyone else just called him “too scared to click buy.” After losing 12 dollars (yes, exactly twelve) on a micro‑cap frog coin in 2021, he loudly declared to his entire family: “From now on, I only trust the coins with muscles!”
$CAKE
So every morning, he made coffee, sat at his computer like a general reviewing troops, and checked only three charts: BTC, ETH, and whatever other top‑market‑cap coin hadn’t scared him yet. When his nephew tried to convince him to diversify into some “fresh new gem,” Harold squinted over his glasses and said, “Son, I’m here for safety, not gymnastics.”
$AVAX
His friends bragged about 50x pumps from obscure tokens whose names sounded like kitchen utensils. Meanwhile, Harold proudly celebrated a peaceful +2% day on Bitcoin as if he had just conquered a small kingdom. He enjoyed the stability so much that he named his houseplants BTC and ETH—claiming they grew straighter than any low‑cap ever could.
$TRX
And although he pretended not to care about market drama, every time Bitcoin sneezed, he refreshed his app faster than his grandson playing video games.

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